Love starts here... with me

In this day and time, love in its purest form appears to be impossible to obtain. Ladies, we are needy creatures, we need to be loved, we need to be validated, we need attention; and when we don't get that we feel somewhat out of sink. I had this thing about saying "men don't like me", every time things didn't work out with me and a male suitor, I would always fall back on this crutch, "men don't like me". It wasn't until I decided to seek the answers in which I sought after, within me. Why did I feel this way, why had I said this over and over again......

I started by taking a long look at myself, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically not looking for flaws, but seeking ways to improve myself. The first thing I wanted to improve was my self esteem, change how I saw myself by improving me, enhancing me, my look, my style, my attitude. I started my walking regimen back up again, I could stand to loose a few bounds and standing around thinking about it or talking about it with my friends wasn't really self improvement or burning calories.In my search for reading material on improving my relationship, once I got one, lol, I came across this book "The Secret" which had nothing to do with realationships by the way, but you may have heard of it its by Rhonda Byrne, its a really great read. The book talks about how our thoughts shape our lives and how our thoughts attract the experiences we have in our lives by the way of the law of attraction.

Immediately I knew that in order to be successful in this transformation or improvement journey I had set out to complete for myself, that it was right here I needed the most help, "MY THOUGHTS" I began to make strides and great efforts to change the way I thought and how I viewed my life's situations. I started to keep a Gratitude Journal a suggestion that the book had offered, I had a journal but there wasn't a lot of gratitude in it. I made daily entries of all that I was grateful to God for, after all how could I expect God to bless me with more or make me better if I had not shown any gratitude for who he had made me to be thus far and all that he had blessed me with. "Yep", this seemed like a great start.

 Later, I realized that I could never be pleasing to God until I asphyxiated my thoughts and my heart on him, but without the self applied pressures to get every step right..... meaning I decided to just relaxed and focused on being me and not being what everyone thought I was or should be, so I deffinately had to get a hold of my thoughts. I had to start to get over myself, forgiving me for all the wrong choices I'd made, and all the mistakes I'd made. I made up in my mind to not allow stress to stress me out or the people that accompanied the stress.

Focusing on myself takes away all negative idle thoughts that always seemed to creep in, I started to love me more and appreciate me more by taking care of me more, or how else was I going to expect a man to do it? After all, now that I had realized that men did like me, it was natural to want to try my hand at love again some day..... soon. Right? I still have a lot of growth to achieve but I'm excited about the start of the process. I decided to love me first before any other brother was given the opportunity to.


 I've met women who say that they don't need a man, now there's a big difference in saying this instead of saying I don't want a man...... because truth be told, every REAL woman wants a good man and should, it's our natural born right to desire a man, we were created for his pleasure and to let you in on a little secret, vise versa. But, until we get a grip on those things that are keeping us from being a part of a good solid committed wholesome happy healthy relationship........ yes, all that...... until we get a grip on everything that is in be tween us and that relationship achievement, we got work to do.