My Personal Testimony

Do yall mind if I testify? Well if you do, oh well, its my page. Last month, I went to the Doctor for my regular check up, and everything was really good! I'd been working out, eating even healthier, I was doing good! My BP was down to normal, my cholesterol was normal, I was GOOD! Then my Doctor began to look puzzled, she was like OMG! This can't be! Now I'm like oh Lawd... she started researching my past records, I say, "what is it?" She says, "your blood platelets are really high". I asked how high? She look at me and said, "725" I asked, what did that mean? She, politely said, Ms. Taylor, I'm gonna need you to see the Oncologist (blood cancer doctor), I took a deep breath and asked, "are you saying I may have cancer? Of coarse she was like tryna sooth me and stuff. But it didn't help. She said to me, you are not making enough red blood cells, and so this has caused your blood platelets to increase, meaning you are more prone to a blood clot, and we don't want this, so I'm like, huh, you telling me! So for three days or so, I'm back and fourth to the doctors for testing for Leukemia and two other cancers I can't even pronounce. The now have me on more meds than I was on before, and I'm sick as a dog, can't sleep, or eat much, and to top it off the word cancer and my name was in the same sentenced. But I thank God for Godly friends and family who pray for real and not just when they get in trouble, lol. But see my miracle wasn't gonna come from just their prayers, but it was gonna be based up on my faith, and my prayer. This is what I prayed, "Lord I need you to touch my body, and heal me of all these crazy ailments, cause, I got better things to do with my time, than fight cancer, I'm sure you have another assignment for me to do, another soul for me to reach out to, a song to sing, and encouragement to give to somebody!! Lord, I need you to heal me, and not let me have leukemia". So later in the week, I see the Oncologist, and they look at what my primary doctor sent over, and run more test, she leaves the room, and when she comes back in, she has this look on her face, she hugs me, and says GOD BLESS YOU, but you do not have Leukemia, (pause) Now, I could have, just went in right there, but she was hugging me and I didn't want to scare her, lol. I do how ever have Anemia and its pretty bad, but it aint cancer, the meds I take to help build my blood, thin it out, and all the other counter acting crap I take, took me 21 days to get use to, but it aint chemo, I feel sick, a little lethargic at times, and tired, but I'm gonna yet live. So as I was cleaning my room just now, I couldn't help but thank God. I said all of that to say this, all my other blood work was GREAT! so why would God not complete the work he started concerning my health. He is an awesome and might God, in which I love with my all. And I keep my self grounded by reminding myself that somebody, didn't get the news that I got that day, somebody right now is fighting cancer or something else, but he saw fit to spare me..... So you see, there's really a story behind my praise, I've been partially blind, high blood pressure, congested heart failure,edema, but to look at me, you would never know, because I don't look like what I been through, and only a fool wouldn't wanna rejoice over how good God is, and has been. The word of God tells me that I can over come by the words of my testimony, and I hope this has encouraged somebody, to keep the faith, to hold on, no matter what the situation may be, trust God. he said he would never leave us, nor for sake us, and that all things were possible if we just believe, casting all of our cares up on him, and our path for our life he was going to make. An it is in times like these, he will give you a new song, so that your own personal praises can go forth. if you've noticed I've been pretty low key, I haven't been posting a whole lot of inspiration, cause I needed it myself. You see me, you see blessed, not my health or my issues, just the blessings of the Lord, cause as his child, a representative of him, thats all I'm allowed let you see, because you need to see his Glory, and not my story. Yall be encouraged, and be blessed. Love you guys, and thanks for your prayers, please, continue for God's not through with me yet.

This Is My Story...

285lbs 

This was me in 2004, I was 285lbs. Unknowingly I was developing high blood pressure, and a developing heart condition. After I had my 3rd child in 1997, within a year I had gained 80 to 100lbs. And this is my story....

I was BIG 272lbs

I never would have thought that I would ever have a weight problem, I was always skinny, but somewhere along the way, I started gaining weight, I think all of those cookies caught up with me which I ate by the package BIG packages.

265lbs

   I didn't realize at first that I had gained the  weight until I took a good look at these pictures one day. You see, I always ate what I wanted, I never put a whole lot of thought into it, I just ate. One day I was getting dressed and I noticed that I looked OLD and I felt what I thought OLD must have felt like. I was tired, my body ached and my knees were always stiff. My energy level had diminished; all I wanted to do was sleep, little did I know a storm within was brewing.

In the mist the Struggle 258lbs
July 2011

Before & After in the mist of my journey....

Me Today 245lbs
October 2011

At 32 I was told I was borderline for hypertension. I just thought my body was just going through the changes a body goes through as a person starts to get older, so I quietly dismissed the diagnosis. Within a year I developed high blood pressure, then I was diagnosed with congestive heart failure a few months later. So whats a girl to do when she feels she's at the point of no return. I was miserable. I was raising 3 boys on my own, working two jobs and going to school, my Dad was dying of cancer and I was struggling to hold on to my then boyfriend. I never felt so helpless and overwhelmed.

253lbs

Me today 245lbs but the battle ain't over yet

Somewhere along way I decided I had to attempt to do something or I was going to die really young, I had to get a grip on my life. My journey hasn't been easy, I've been up and I've been down, but I kept getting back up to fight this thing they called obesity.

 I started working out, got me a good little momentum going, then I lost it, then I would start it up again, and loose it again, this was not helping the matter at all. In 2009 I had an optical stroke and temporarily lost my eye sight due to high blood pressure which caused my heart to show signs of failure.... This was the last draw, I had to fight harder, no matter what, I knew that if I lost this battle I was gonna die. So I changed the way I looked at food, I stopped eating just to eat, I stopped eating just to eat, and only ate when I was hungry and instead of setting unrealistic weight loss goals, I didn't set any, my goals became me developing a healthier life style. Six years later I was down to 248lbs, my weight fluctuates because of my body retaining fluid, in which I take meds for. Being over weight really messed my body up, it over worked my heart, causing it to become enlarged, I'm telling you I was just a mess. 

It was time to put in some real work...

Lady Deon

After

and then... I saw something

Before 

Labor Day 2011

My journey isn't over but the victory is MINE!

Strawberry & Spinach Salad w/ Feta Cheese Glazed Pecans Strawberry Wine Vinaigrette 

Since 2004 up until today.... I've lost a total of 40lbs. which may not be much, but the quality of life I've gained is PRICELESS! I eat differently, I see food as food and not my friend or my comforter, but as a source of energy and nourishment. I exercise regularly and my new favorite comfort food is a Strawberry Spinach Salad. I take all my meds from the doctor and I eat healthy... and its paying off, slowly, but how many of you know good things come to those who wait.

Reality Check! (Rampage of Thoughts)

I ended my day as I had for the last few weeks, I went to work, hit gym, came home, showered, cooked dinner for my kids and logged on to my Facebook. As I scanned through the various posts, I ran across a Youtube post of a old high school classmate about a solar storm that NASA believes may take place next year sometime and affect all of technology as we know it in America possibly setting this country back 100 years or worst (NASA). My mind began to churn with thoughts, I continued to read the other posts after I responded to the post of my former classmate, and ran across the post of my cousin who had asked a question, "If there was anything that you could do or say differently, what would that be?" My mind still disturb from my classmates post and churning with all kinds of thoughts, now was really churning. Was there something I wish I had done or said differently? I responded by saying that I would have prayed harder and longer. Because I realize that had I done this, I could have avoided a lot of mistakes, decisions, and wrong choices in my life that I can never change. See what a lot of people don't know about me, is that I am very aware of me, my surroundings, and often think on the things to come. But, I must admit, I find myself blocking out these thoughts because they frighten me, and I realize that this is because I am not ready for my life to end or change tragically as I know it. But life for us all is changing daily, its in the News paper, on the TV, radio and internet. There are people loosing jobs, the price of food, gas, clothes, and dwelling units are increasing by what seems to be, by the minute. Our children are lost, our culture is distorted, our way of life is increasingly changing and filled with too many compromises and loop holes. And change is rapidly increasing its pace and overtaking us by the minute. We've already had the END OF THE WORLD scare back in May, remember? But, my question still remains, are we ready, and should we be more focused on these things than others. I know that we can't stop living to await our fate and end, but I find myself thinking shouldn't there be something else we should be doing. The answer surely is not blowing in the wind, that's for sure. Yes, we are going to church, some of us are praying and fasting, but I ask what for a house, husband, wife, car??? No we can't stop living, but we can live better, by loving more, being more forgiving, more understanding even, and checking ourselves and our own lives to see if it measures up to the Word of God and his standards instead of our own or what the world now considers normal. I find myself asking "Is what I want more important than what God wants for me?" There are so many wrong things in life appearing OKAY, but its not. We get to caught up in life; some more than others, some attempt to get it together and hold it together only to loose our grip every now and then but we get back up again and regroup and regrip. Some of us, are high strung and separate ourselves from all manner of biblical good and conform ourselves to what is Earthly good, compromising biblical good to fit in when and where we want it. There are those who say, "I can't be worried or concerned about all of this", "I have a life to live and things to do"....... And all that's fine and dandy, but what happens when there are no more chances and no more time, then what, will saying "forgive me" have the same worth and value it does right now? Hum, I wonder..... We see tragedies all the time, some have hit home, some are abroad, but what happens when...... and I'll let you fill in the blank.

Deon,  

Making A Differance

I was sitting here at the staion and I got a call from a listener who just needed someone to talk to. Someone had made a comment to her that she  felt was offensive and she wasn't sure what they meant, and she didn't want her thoughts about the matter to get the best of her, so she called the station in hopes of reaching someone who could help her through these thoughts, and she got me. Not knowing what was troubling her I lended her my ear and allowed her to vent her frustrations to me. After listening to her tell me about the comment that had her so in an uproar within, I began to explain to her that she may have misunderstood it the wrong way and that what appeared to be an insult was really a compliment. The statement made to her was; "her having her son was the best thing that could have ever happen to her". (for reference)

 I said all that to say this, in this life we live, we do not truely belong to ourselves, but we are vessels for the use of the Lord. Now those of you who may be reading this, I don't know how spiritual you are or if you have a relationship with the Lord, and I would say that if you don't, you may want to develop one, because we do not belong to ourselves. We ought to live life in such a way that we are fit to be used at any given moment by God, because you never know who's blessing you are carrying. Your life is a gift, but not just to you, but to others as well. My quest and prayer is to be better in every way possible, and to affect the atmosphere around me in some way. Now, where others would have turned this lady away, or brushed her off, God saw fit to use me, and that felt good, and I felt honored to be of some use. The lady and I continued to talk some and ended the call with a prayer, and she felt empowered to go on and be better in her own life. My life is real, is me not being afraid or ashamed to share my love, my testomonies, my experiences, my ability to be transparent to others, that they may be impacted, provoked (in a positive way) and inspired, because my life really is real...... And I wanna live it in such a way that I make a differnce.

Yall Be Blessed!

The misconceptions of dating...... "Where did the love go"

Do you ever get irritated with the dating? I do. What ever happened to the guy that would ask, "Say if you're not busy Saturday, can I take you out?" What happened? Guys gotta improve their game and understand, that there are still a few of us ladies who like that kinda stuff! If I meet one more grown 40 something year old man tryna run game I'ma scream! First of all, understand this, I know that when a man first meet or encounter a female, he already knows whether he will approach her or not, and what his purpose for approaching her if he decides to approach her. So why, bother with the preliminaries of all that rig-a-morrore  and rhetoric in the initial encounter. Brothas, just be strait up with us sistas, and be truthful about your intentions, okay. Kill this thought now that every woman is a hoer or a gold digger, and every woman carries 99 bags of issues on our shoulders these are just the ones you pick, and if I hear one more time about how career woman have all these high standards, I'ma scream! When we depart from these stereotypes about each other, we as a black race of men and women.... NO WE as men and women.... we gone be alright. Sistas, not every man is a dog out to get what he can get, and brothas its some really good sistas out there ready and willing to love you if you were to dare use your heart to feel and find her. But, we need to get past the BS and the games. Many of us aren't getting any younger, lol, and a whole bunch of us are already old. I was created for your pleasures bru, but as your woman and wife, not just your woman. People we need to pull it together, cause I'm ready for love in its purest and realest form, I'm ready to settle down and be Mrs. SOMEBODY! But if we don't change the way we view ourselves.......~sigh~

I asked a brotha what was his opinion on the 42+% of African American women being single, was it our fault or what? He boldly stated that MEN were the reason. I was like HUH? shocked that he said that, he explained that, its not that women's standards where high or any of the other rhetorical crap but men just aren't ready for what women are ready for, because men feel that the more women you have the more of a man you are. He explained that we as woman we think marriage, men they think FUN. Men are sexual creatures, woman are emotional creatures. Add this to our own misconceptions about one another, dating and marriage and you get what we now have, a mess and 42+% Black women single. This is so much deeper or at least I could get deeper, but I want.... not right now anyway. But I hope those of you who find yourself reading this, will stop and think about yourself, your love, your desires to be loved and what you are willing to put into a relationship in order to get out of what you want.

Fabric Of A Woman

W O M A N - Webster defines us as Female, the Bible tells us that we were taken from the rib of man, shaped and formed in a speacial unique and spectacular way, one that brings comfort, nurturement, and  pleasure. Women have the capablity of barring life, and sustaining that life, we are teachers, and homemakers, and WE are the equivalent to the masculine compounds in -man. We are delicate creatures, effectionate and emotional. God felt the need to create us in such a way necessary for our mere existance and purpose. Therefore let us not allow ourselves to be degraded or devalued by conforming to the way of society, but let us embrace the loveliness that we possess and our unique ability to be who we are as women.  


Respect yourself and others are instantly commanded to respect you as well, love yourself, and others will love you. If you are single, do not complain about it, but embrace it until he comes, if you are married, be whom God has set forth for you to be as wife, before the foundation of the World, love your husband as God has commanded you to and cleave to him, as he to you. Do not be haughty and tare down your house with your own hands or words from your mouth. If you are a mother, sister or daughter, consider the position a blessing, because we as women hold a value far more than precious rubies.


Take pride in who you are, embrace all that there is to you. For you are beautifully and wonderfully made...... You are a W O M A N.


Deon Taylor

"Be Good To Yourself" 

This Song Says A Lot...... About me.

Life Just Starting to Get Better!

When I was a little girl, I use say I wanted to be a singer and a model, I was gonna be RICH & FAMOUS, lol, unfortunately my life is far from that. Although my childhood dreams of becoming rich and famous by passed me for the moment, I've come to realize that I still have the opportunity to live an exciting life and be happy and who knows maybe even RICH! Sometime we experience things in our lives that cause us to question God or at least want to question him, because WE don't understand his plan or his plan and our own personal plan really doesn't seem to appear to add up. So we find ourselves in this robotic mode, which becomes our norm. I am here ladies and gentleman, well I realized that I was there and decide to break free from the shell one peace at a time.

Someone asked me why do I blog and what made me want to blog about myself? Well, the answer is simple, because I know that I am not the only woman who is dealing with the things that I am dealing with and I love to write and I enjoy blogging and I hope to become a professional blogger in the near future. Yes they have professional Bloggers! Lol. My life is as real as it gets. I am a single mom, not in a relationship, I work two jobs, I'm 12 hours from receiving my Associates degree and can't afford to go back to school right now and I often live from pay check to pay check and dag-gum-it I get lonely!! But because of who I am, I'm expected to maintain, be cool without break downs and always be leveled headed. My kids think I can fix everything and that I have a money tree growing outside. Lol. So you tell me, what woman can't relate to that or at least some of it. I don't know why life for me is as it is, and I don't complain, I just live it and thank God for it, only now, I've chose to live it a little differently, and I can't wait to see the end results.

The first thing I did, was locate my peace, my own personal peace. Sometimes the people in our lives can disrupt our peace so you have to either put some distance there or expel them from your life if possible. Your peace is the most import thing and its your right as a human being. If a person has peace they can think more freely, they can function better, right? Second thing I did was have a long conversation with me, I was so depressed I didn't even relize I was, I was ready to quit my job, and lol, now that I think about it, I really didn't have a plan past that, I just wanted to walk away. Now, keep in mind I have 19 yrs vested on my job, that would have been a mess, "Right"! And so unwise, lol.

But God is such an awesome God, he knows just how to fix us, our problems, our issues, and whatever else, even without us asking for help. He'll put others in your life to add quality, to bring hope and help jump start your journey or even put you, your life and everything in it, into perspective. He did that for me. So I figure well Lord if you can do that, you can do even more greater things, all I had to do was think out side the box, by faith! I took a life assessment of myself, and everything I saw that needed improvement I start to work on and pray about. All of this jumped started my journey to a BETTER me, mentally physically, spiritually, and emotionally. And by faith my life just gets better everyday, because its how I have chose to see it, instead of the things that I've failed at or lost out on in the past. I have chose to create my future! Didn't God tell us to "Ask", and it was gonna be given to us as long as we believed, well,  I want God to help me be a better person, a better woman, a better mom, sister, co-worker, just better.

When a person is in a better place they function BETTER, life gets BETTER. Is this easy, for some... but for others, nope, but its what I want, and what I'm willing to strive for. Third, if you are person who puts everyone else's needs before your own, like I USE TO BE, if you find yourself going around trying to save everybody, advice everybody, pray for everybody, help everybody, STOP IT NOW! you are not God, you are a helper yes, but one who can only help so much. If you continue to do all this, you'll find yourself in an unhappy place and empty too. Save you, rescue you, put you first sometimes, the rest of the world will just have to wait. This helps to avoid unnecessary stress and depression. Take time for you, because you are just as important as those people, places and things you have allowed to become so important to you. Live your LIFE, better.

Love starts here... with me

In this day and time, love in its purest form appears to be impossible to obtain. Ladies, we are needy creatures, we need to be loved, we need to be validated, we need attention; and when we don't get that we feel somewhat out of sink. I had this thing about saying "men don't like me", every time things didn't work out with me and a male suitor, I would always fall back on this crutch, "men don't like me". It wasn't until I decided to seek the answers in which I sought after, within me. Why did I feel this way, why had I said this over and over again......

I started by taking a long look at myself, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically not looking for flaws, but seeking ways to improve myself. The first thing I wanted to improve was my self esteem, change how I saw myself by improving me, enhancing me, my look, my style, my attitude. I started my walking regimen back up again, I could stand to loose a few bounds and standing around thinking about it or talking about it with my friends wasn't really self improvement or burning calories.In my search for reading material on improving my relationship, once I got one, lol, I came across this book "The Secret" which had nothing to do with realationships by the way, but you may have heard of it its by Rhonda Byrne, its a really great read. The book talks about how our thoughts shape our lives and how our thoughts attract the experiences we have in our lives by the way of the law of attraction.

Immediately I knew that in order to be successful in this transformation or improvement journey I had set out to complete for myself, that it was right here I needed the most help, "MY THOUGHTS" I began to make strides and great efforts to change the way I thought and how I viewed my life's situations. I started to keep a Gratitude Journal a suggestion that the book had offered, I had a journal but there wasn't a lot of gratitude in it. I made daily entries of all that I was grateful to God for, after all how could I expect God to bless me with more or make me better if I had not shown any gratitude for who he had made me to be thus far and all that he had blessed me with. "Yep", this seemed like a great start.

 Later, I realized that I could never be pleasing to God until I asphyxiated my thoughts and my heart on him, but without the self applied pressures to get every step right..... meaning I decided to just relaxed and focused on being me and not being what everyone thought I was or should be, so I deffinately had to get a hold of my thoughts. I had to start to get over myself, forgiving me for all the wrong choices I'd made, and all the mistakes I'd made. I made up in my mind to not allow stress to stress me out or the people that accompanied the stress.

Focusing on myself takes away all negative idle thoughts that always seemed to creep in, I started to love me more and appreciate me more by taking care of me more, or how else was I going to expect a man to do it? After all, now that I had realized that men did like me, it was natural to want to try my hand at love again some day..... soon. Right? I still have a lot of growth to achieve but I'm excited about the start of the process. I decided to love me first before any other brother was given the opportunity to.


 I've met women who say that they don't need a man, now there's a big difference in saying this instead of saying I don't want a man...... because truth be told, every REAL woman wants a good man and should, it's our natural born right to desire a man, we were created for his pleasure and to let you in on a little secret, vise versa. But, until we get a grip on those things that are keeping us from being a part of a good solid committed wholesome happy healthy relationship........ yes, all that...... until we get a grip on everything that is in be tween us and that relationship achievement, we got work to do.