Making A Differance

I was sitting here at the staion and I got a call from a listener who just needed someone to talk to. Someone had made a comment to her that she  felt was offensive and she wasn't sure what they meant, and she didn't want her thoughts about the matter to get the best of her, so she called the station in hopes of reaching someone who could help her through these thoughts, and she got me. Not knowing what was troubling her I lended her my ear and allowed her to vent her frustrations to me. After listening to her tell me about the comment that had her so in an uproar within, I began to explain to her that she may have misunderstood it the wrong way and that what appeared to be an insult was really a compliment. The statement made to her was; "her having her son was the best thing that could have ever happen to her". (for reference)

 I said all that to say this, in this life we live, we do not truely belong to ourselves, but we are vessels for the use of the Lord. Now those of you who may be reading this, I don't know how spiritual you are or if you have a relationship with the Lord, and I would say that if you don't, you may want to develop one, because we do not belong to ourselves. We ought to live life in such a way that we are fit to be used at any given moment by God, because you never know who's blessing you are carrying. Your life is a gift, but not just to you, but to others as well. My quest and prayer is to be better in every way possible, and to affect the atmosphere around me in some way. Now, where others would have turned this lady away, or brushed her off, God saw fit to use me, and that felt good, and I felt honored to be of some use. The lady and I continued to talk some and ended the call with a prayer, and she felt empowered to go on and be better in her own life. My life is real, is me not being afraid or ashamed to share my love, my testomonies, my experiences, my ability to be transparent to others, that they may be impacted, provoked (in a positive way) and inspired, because my life really is real...... And I wanna live it in such a way that I make a differnce.

Yall Be Blessed!

The misconceptions of dating...... "Where did the love go"

Do you ever get irritated with the dating? I do. What ever happened to the guy that would ask, "Say if you're not busy Saturday, can I take you out?" What happened? Guys gotta improve their game and understand, that there are still a few of us ladies who like that kinda stuff! If I meet one more grown 40 something year old man tryna run game I'ma scream! First of all, understand this, I know that when a man first meet or encounter a female, he already knows whether he will approach her or not, and what his purpose for approaching her if he decides to approach her. So why, bother with the preliminaries of all that rig-a-morrore  and rhetoric in the initial encounter. Brothas, just be strait up with us sistas, and be truthful about your intentions, okay. Kill this thought now that every woman is a hoer or a gold digger, and every woman carries 99 bags of issues on our shoulders these are just the ones you pick, and if I hear one more time about how career woman have all these high standards, I'ma scream! When we depart from these stereotypes about each other, we as a black race of men and women.... NO WE as men and women.... we gone be alright. Sistas, not every man is a dog out to get what he can get, and brothas its some really good sistas out there ready and willing to love you if you were to dare use your heart to feel and find her. But, we need to get past the BS and the games. Many of us aren't getting any younger, lol, and a whole bunch of us are already old. I was created for your pleasures bru, but as your woman and wife, not just your woman. People we need to pull it together, cause I'm ready for love in its purest and realest form, I'm ready to settle down and be Mrs. SOMEBODY! But if we don't change the way we view ourselves.......~sigh~

I asked a brotha what was his opinion on the 42+% of African American women being single, was it our fault or what? He boldly stated that MEN were the reason. I was like HUH? shocked that he said that, he explained that, its not that women's standards where high or any of the other rhetorical crap but men just aren't ready for what women are ready for, because men feel that the more women you have the more of a man you are. He explained that we as woman we think marriage, men they think FUN. Men are sexual creatures, woman are emotional creatures. Add this to our own misconceptions about one another, dating and marriage and you get what we now have, a mess and 42+% Black women single. This is so much deeper or at least I could get deeper, but I want.... not right now anyway. But I hope those of you who find yourself reading this, will stop and think about yourself, your love, your desires to be loved and what you are willing to put into a relationship in order to get out of what you want.

Fabric Of A Woman

W O M A N - Webster defines us as Female, the Bible tells us that we were taken from the rib of man, shaped and formed in a speacial unique and spectacular way, one that brings comfort, nurturement, and  pleasure. Women have the capablity of barring life, and sustaining that life, we are teachers, and homemakers, and WE are the equivalent to the masculine compounds in -man. We are delicate creatures, effectionate and emotional. God felt the need to create us in such a way necessary for our mere existance and purpose. Therefore let us not allow ourselves to be degraded or devalued by conforming to the way of society, but let us embrace the loveliness that we possess and our unique ability to be who we are as women.  


Respect yourself and others are instantly commanded to respect you as well, love yourself, and others will love you. If you are single, do not complain about it, but embrace it until he comes, if you are married, be whom God has set forth for you to be as wife, before the foundation of the World, love your husband as God has commanded you to and cleave to him, as he to you. Do not be haughty and tare down your house with your own hands or words from your mouth. If you are a mother, sister or daughter, consider the position a blessing, because we as women hold a value far more than precious rubies.


Take pride in who you are, embrace all that there is to you. For you are beautifully and wonderfully made...... You are a W O M A N.


Deon Taylor

"Be Good To Yourself" 

This Song Says A Lot...... About me.

Life Just Starting to Get Better!

When I was a little girl, I use say I wanted to be a singer and a model, I was gonna be RICH & FAMOUS, lol, unfortunately my life is far from that. Although my childhood dreams of becoming rich and famous by passed me for the moment, I've come to realize that I still have the opportunity to live an exciting life and be happy and who knows maybe even RICH! Sometime we experience things in our lives that cause us to question God or at least want to question him, because WE don't understand his plan or his plan and our own personal plan really doesn't seem to appear to add up. So we find ourselves in this robotic mode, which becomes our norm. I am here ladies and gentleman, well I realized that I was there and decide to break free from the shell one peace at a time.

Someone asked me why do I blog and what made me want to blog about myself? Well, the answer is simple, because I know that I am not the only woman who is dealing with the things that I am dealing with and I love to write and I enjoy blogging and I hope to become a professional blogger in the near future. Yes they have professional Bloggers! Lol. My life is as real as it gets. I am a single mom, not in a relationship, I work two jobs, I'm 12 hours from receiving my Associates degree and can't afford to go back to school right now and I often live from pay check to pay check and dag-gum-it I get lonely!! But because of who I am, I'm expected to maintain, be cool without break downs and always be leveled headed. My kids think I can fix everything and that I have a money tree growing outside. Lol. So you tell me, what woman can't relate to that or at least some of it. I don't know why life for me is as it is, and I don't complain, I just live it and thank God for it, only now, I've chose to live it a little differently, and I can't wait to see the end results.

The first thing I did, was locate my peace, my own personal peace. Sometimes the people in our lives can disrupt our peace so you have to either put some distance there or expel them from your life if possible. Your peace is the most import thing and its your right as a human being. If a person has peace they can think more freely, they can function better, right? Second thing I did was have a long conversation with me, I was so depressed I didn't even relize I was, I was ready to quit my job, and lol, now that I think about it, I really didn't have a plan past that, I just wanted to walk away. Now, keep in mind I have 19 yrs vested on my job, that would have been a mess, "Right"! And so unwise, lol.

But God is such an awesome God, he knows just how to fix us, our problems, our issues, and whatever else, even without us asking for help. He'll put others in your life to add quality, to bring hope and help jump start your journey or even put you, your life and everything in it, into perspective. He did that for me. So I figure well Lord if you can do that, you can do even more greater things, all I had to do was think out side the box, by faith! I took a life assessment of myself, and everything I saw that needed improvement I start to work on and pray about. All of this jumped started my journey to a BETTER me, mentally physically, spiritually, and emotionally. And by faith my life just gets better everyday, because its how I have chose to see it, instead of the things that I've failed at or lost out on in the past. I have chose to create my future! Didn't God tell us to "Ask", and it was gonna be given to us as long as we believed, well,  I want God to help me be a better person, a better woman, a better mom, sister, co-worker, just better.

When a person is in a better place they function BETTER, life gets BETTER. Is this easy, for some... but for others, nope, but its what I want, and what I'm willing to strive for. Third, if you are person who puts everyone else's needs before your own, like I USE TO BE, if you find yourself going around trying to save everybody, advice everybody, pray for everybody, help everybody, STOP IT NOW! you are not God, you are a helper yes, but one who can only help so much. If you continue to do all this, you'll find yourself in an unhappy place and empty too. Save you, rescue you, put you first sometimes, the rest of the world will just have to wait. This helps to avoid unnecessary stress and depression. Take time for you, because you are just as important as those people, places and things you have allowed to become so important to you. Live your LIFE, better.

Love starts here... with me

In this day and time, love in its purest form appears to be impossible to obtain. Ladies, we are needy creatures, we need to be loved, we need to be validated, we need attention; and when we don't get that we feel somewhat out of sink. I had this thing about saying "men don't like me", every time things didn't work out with me and a male suitor, I would always fall back on this crutch, "men don't like me". It wasn't until I decided to seek the answers in which I sought after, within me. Why did I feel this way, why had I said this over and over again......

I started by taking a long look at myself, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically not looking for flaws, but seeking ways to improve myself. The first thing I wanted to improve was my self esteem, change how I saw myself by improving me, enhancing me, my look, my style, my attitude. I started my walking regimen back up again, I could stand to loose a few bounds and standing around thinking about it or talking about it with my friends wasn't really self improvement or burning calories.In my search for reading material on improving my relationship, once I got one, lol, I came across this book "The Secret" which had nothing to do with realationships by the way, but you may have heard of it its by Rhonda Byrne, its a really great read. The book talks about how our thoughts shape our lives and how our thoughts attract the experiences we have in our lives by the way of the law of attraction.

Immediately I knew that in order to be successful in this transformation or improvement journey I had set out to complete for myself, that it was right here I needed the most help, "MY THOUGHTS" I began to make strides and great efforts to change the way I thought and how I viewed my life's situations. I started to keep a Gratitude Journal a suggestion that the book had offered, I had a journal but there wasn't a lot of gratitude in it. I made daily entries of all that I was grateful to God for, after all how could I expect God to bless me with more or make me better if I had not shown any gratitude for who he had made me to be thus far and all that he had blessed me with. "Yep", this seemed like a great start.

 Later, I realized that I could never be pleasing to God until I asphyxiated my thoughts and my heart on him, but without the self applied pressures to get every step right..... meaning I decided to just relaxed and focused on being me and not being what everyone thought I was or should be, so I deffinately had to get a hold of my thoughts. I had to start to get over myself, forgiving me for all the wrong choices I'd made, and all the mistakes I'd made. I made up in my mind to not allow stress to stress me out or the people that accompanied the stress.

Focusing on myself takes away all negative idle thoughts that always seemed to creep in, I started to love me more and appreciate me more by taking care of me more, or how else was I going to expect a man to do it? After all, now that I had realized that men did like me, it was natural to want to try my hand at love again some day..... soon. Right? I still have a lot of growth to achieve but I'm excited about the start of the process. I decided to love me first before any other brother was given the opportunity to.


 I've met women who say that they don't need a man, now there's a big difference in saying this instead of saying I don't want a man...... because truth be told, every REAL woman wants a good man and should, it's our natural born right to desire a man, we were created for his pleasure and to let you in on a little secret, vise versa. But, until we get a grip on those things that are keeping us from being a part of a good solid committed wholesome happy healthy relationship........ yes, all that...... until we get a grip on everything that is in be tween us and that relationship achievement, we got work to do.